In celebration of Halloween which I still don’t quite understand, I pay homage to the many ways that people scare the crap out of others in order to receive pleasure...very disturbing.

Our BFF, Sweet Pea, sent me a totally nondescript email link to a game of tic, tac, toe.  The screen prompted me to pick an ‘X’ or an ‘O’ which I did and began to place my ‘X’ in a square...the computer put an ‘O’ up to block me...another ‘X’ from me, then there was a pause as if the game had shut down when ALL OF A SUDDEN!!!!!!!!!!! the entire screen is filled with the SCARIEST MONSTER FACE moving all around and SCREAMING!!!!!!!!!! from an open, bloody mouth...well...it just scared the peewaddle out of me.  My heart literally stopped and I had to be given CPR right there in my chair.

Now, here’s the thing...I was SO furious at P for scaring me in such a, may I say it?, cheap way that I immediately called her to protest, and I mean really protest...make her feel really bad because of the cost of the EMS boys who came over to revive me...I wanted to create an atmosphere of doubt in her mind about whether or not I would ever speak to her again.  And, as it happens, I believe my exact words to her were, “I AM NEVER EVER GOING TO SPEAK TO YOU AGAIN...EVER!”  She just laughed and laughed and told me that she had sent the same thing to everyone.  There was no getting through to her about how upsetting her action had been...how damaging to my psyche.  Those people who scare others just don’t care.  Their point IS to scare you so if you get upset, that makes them happy.

I can’t wait for Christmas and Jesus.  He would never scare me...well, not like that anyway.
KK
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To me, Halloween only meant that I could go on the prowl for candy all over the neighborhood, and if you didn’t have any or weren’t at home I would tump over your geranium pot.  Trick or treat!  I was the bad seed on Halloween nights.

The Ancient One, AKA The Stunning One when we were little in the fifties, wasn’t one for costumes.  Back then you couldn’t get them at Walmart because there weren’t any Walmarts.  You pretty much had to make them or put in some energy making paper-mache angel wings or paint a big yellow ‘S’ on a beach towel so your son could be Superman.  I do remember one year when KK was dressed up like a rabbit with big tall ears and everything.  That’s the last costume I remember seeing come out the screen door of our house.  As KK says, we had to use our own imaginations so we went as Tom Sawyer or a homeless person.

There was the stereotypical old lady down the block who always made home-made, candy-popcorn balls that none of the kids wanted.  We wanted real candy in brightly colored wrappers or candy corn.  I felt sorry for that old lady because I knew it took some work to make those popcorn balls so I always hit her house and then gave mine to the brown Standard Poodle that lived two doors down.  He loved them but died early, and I always blamed myself for that.  I didn’t tell anybody though.

I am ready for the kids this year.  I’m going to be a witch.  I got a great hat from the ritzy drug store that has bats and spiders and bugs all over it, and I’m ready to scare the kids.  I like to scare people, especially little kids.  Anyway, the costumes these days make the kids look really cute and I am half way through with my caramel popcorn balls.  Nyuck, nyuck.

SalGal