No, I don't think civility is dead, but we are facing a possible pandemic of incivility. I am very confrontational over this problem wherever I meet it, and generally get a good result. It's amazing how people, when confronted over their less-than-charming behaviour, generally tell you that they are having a bad day, feel ill, have worries, etc., etc. At that point, I listen, sympathize, and tell them that I too am not having the best day/week/year, and that seeing them smile at me has made me feel a whole lot better.
Civility is not dead ,however, it is in dire need a full dose of "please," "thank you," "excuse me," and most important, "I am sorry." Somewhere along the line it seems that we have forgotten these important words. I am saddened that rudeness seems to the norm and is accepted by many as, "That's just the way people are these days."
There is not much I can do about other people and their rudeness, but I can make sure that I do not forget the manners I was taught by my parents; they were truly of the "practice what you preach mindset." If each one of us does the same, perhaps we can return to a kinder and gentler time. I think the bigger question is what is making people so angry that they resort to being unkind to one another?
Vannie, you said most eloquently requirements for a return to civil discourse - beginning in how we treat one another in our homes. The fallout of 'nice' is widespread, contagious and easily takes root, thrives and grows. Kind words and smiles, compliments, small favors for those you encounter - all cost free gifts you can deliver - up close and personal at no dollar cost. Please be good to one another? Excuse me for sounding like an old lady, but then, I am. Thank you for patience in 'listening' to my words. I extend a warm smile to all and group hug. May your God bless each and every one of you. Enjoy life - it is short. Much nicer when it's fun.
We are not barbarians quite yet. What I have noticed is an overly vane society immersed in what looks good, what runs good, what works fast and brings gratification with the least amount of effort. So what has been lost, out of necessity, is grace. My son, when he visits, often catches me watcing a movie on TCM and he asks, "Dad did people really act like that back then"? and aware that he has been texting the whole time, I answer... Yes. Civility was once a valued human condition. Today it is a smoke screen for people pleasing and politcal matriculation. Of those who are civil continue your efforts to be so. What you shall inherit is beyond description. Teach your children well.
Sadly yes! I think it has to do with the "I, Me, Mine mentality. Also being civilised today seems to be a deficit rather than a plus. Taking the high rd. as Obama does, is(as it appears) is getting him no where. look at Fox (so-called news)
Civility is not dead YET - like the white rhino, it survives in small pockets. Sadly the decline of two-parent families, respect in the home for each other, plus Dr. Spock telling everyone way back in the 60s that non-confrontation was the way to go with child raising, has just about put paid to civility. Aggression has taken over. In our house it's l960 and will remain that way ! Our kids are still thoughtful and polite, and our grandchild is showing hopeful signs ! Only by taking back responsibility for the raising of our families and not leaving it to teachers or the state will we turn the tide. Anyway, selfishly I like how it feels when a pleasant word or greeting has made someone I meet smile back at me. It maks my day.
Not barbarians quite yet? Have you seen some of the "reality" shows? Not exactly best role models. "monkey see, monkey do" Yes TCM great example of not only civility but intellectualism. When I look at older shows like thosew from the 60-70's we where on the right track.