How Do I Sabotage Me? Let Me Count the Ways!

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Added: Tue. Jun 30, 2009 10:59am
Posted in: Fitness

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 Valentine’s Day was five months ago and the chocolates are long gone. Still I’m pre-occupied with love, specifically how we nurture and take care of ourselves—or don’t.

I have more than a passing interest in the subject since the scale is up six pounds. Apparently, losing weight is a different skill than maintaining. Just when I thought I could relax, it’s back to the drawing board.

On the positive side—thanks to exercise, I’m in the best physical condition since high school and my clothes still fit.

Nonetheless, I’m concerned. So during a neighborhood  walk with a fitness team of friends, the “We Can Do It” Rosies, we came up with 6 dysfunctional behaviors that need changing.

1) Be a perfectionist—wrong! One woman confessed if she fell apart on Thursday, she had to wait to Monday to get back on track. Another reported she didn’t keep a food diary because she couldn’t do it perfectly.

Replace the perfectionist’s creed—“If I can’t do it right, I won’t do it”—with “Progress, not perfection, is the goal.” Imperfection is part of the human condition. Lighten up and laugh, especially at ourselves!

2) Go unconscious while eating—wrong! Dining out, I watched with fascination as a patron took the next bite of food before she finished chewing the last one. In between, she stabbed a forkful from her spouse’s plate.

Granted I’m not that bad (although I confess to sampling my husband’s entrée “just to see what it tastes like&rdquo but I’m hardly flawless. If I watch TV while eating, I want seconds because I haven’t experienced eating “firsts.” Several of us can’t eat sugar without triggering a craving for more.

Our new approach—rather than re-cage the sugar beast, go without. Record daily food, including calories in vitamins and supplements. Stay honest about portions. To enjoy eating, take it slow. Counting to 10 between bites makes it easier to be satisfied with smaller portions.

3) Put others’ needs first—wrong! Houseguests throw me off. Besides cooking special meals (which I also eat), I’m preoccupied with the mechanics of life—getting a load of laundry done, preparing for the next meal—instead of exercising

Strategy: Remember advice for airline stewardesses. When oxygen is needed, first put on your own mask. Then help passengers.

Last time I had company, I served breakfast after I finished my workout routine. No one minded. The problem was in my head.

4) Distract yourself with clutter—wrong! It’s difficult to focus with “stuff” around, especially if it’s broken, surplus or disorganized. A clean office and kitchen sink do wonders for my outlook.

Strategy: Stop buying more. Reduce possessions. Keep the remainder repaired, cleaned and organized.

5) Try to do too much—wrong! Of the many sabotage practices, this is my worst. If there’s a place like AA for workaholics, I should attend daily meetings.

A lifelong sense of “time scarcity” triggers anxiety. Realizing time on earth is finite, I feel an urgency to make hay while the sun shines. How ironic if this pressure triggers premature demise!

Strategy: Set priorities. Don’t let “priority creep” turn each task into “Must Do” or worse, “Must Do Perfectly.” Breathe deeply and stop. See? The world didn’t come to an end! Play more, not less.

6) Make excuses and procrastinate—wrong! To expedite communication, assign numbers to excuses. “I didn’t have time to exercise today” is number one. “I overate because food looked good” is two. Three is “I’ll start tomorrow”. Besides sharing our list, we can add it to our medical files, and later, our tombstones.

Strategy: Toss out excuses with oversized clothes. Begin now.

George Orwell said that most people want to be good most of the time but few of us want to be good all the time. Maybe he's right. Like most people, I don’t want to be good all the time. But if I can’t be good all the time, maybe I could be a little better a little more of the time.