Rubbermaid in Afghanistan?

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Added: Mon. Sep 07, 2009 11:42am
Posted in: Politics

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We've all heard of Al-Qaeda in Iraq but Rubbermaid in Afghanistan?  Tell me I didn't see a bajillion clear plastic storage containers being used in the Afghan elections?  Were they from "The Container Store" in Kabul?  (next to "Turban Outfitters" at the Kabul Galleria).

And how lucky was the container salesperson in that territory?  Talk about low expectations. The first convesation between the salesperson and sales manager may have gone something like: "...yes, we know your territory's Afghanistan.  Well, no, they haven't discovered clothes hangers or bar soap, yet - just do your best and .....and you sold how many?  What election are you talking about...they need our containers for what?"  Or, something like that.

Inside sources tell me bid requirement #2a - Ballot Boxes read: "easily stuffable...able to fit under bed."  Must be a lotta high beds in Afghanistan.  Of course, considering they lead the world in the production of opium, there's evidently a lotta "high" goin' on in Afghanistan.  Which may explain the containers and the ceremonial dipping of fingers in ink - indelible, no less. (In a country not known for it's impeccable hygiene!)

Speaking of that time-tested finger dip, did anyone notice if they were using my all-time favorite 'Sheaffer Permanent Blue/Black #22?'  Is that "finger dipping" thing just a ploy by the ballpoint pen industry, to use up all available fountain pen ink?  Hmmm...before you know it, we'll be seeing IBM typewriters in Afghan offices, everywhere.

Good news is,  those clear, plastic containers are sure signs - along with the rampant ballot stuffing - that the Afghans are catching up to us Americans.  With any luck at all, they'll soon have Domino's Pasta Bread bowls.  Shortly after that arrives, I imagine the recount will come to a crashing halt...as Afghans discover siestas.  Just call it another gift from their friends in the USA.