Added: Thu. Jan 24, 2013 4:15pm
When you're flat on your back with the flu, the ceiling becomes a blank slate on which you can write your thoughts. Still bedbound on day five of what experts say is usually a three-day event (I would love to personally update these "experts"), I have moved on from feeling sorry for myself to thinking about the advantages of this dramatic interruption in my life's reel. I found 10 benefits to offset the inconvenient and uncomfortable minuses:
- You save on groceries.
- You lose weight quickly.
- You get to play hooky. Once friends learn you are sick, no one wants you to attend a meeting or a party. And you don't feel a trace of guilt for abandoning your exercise program.
- You don't have to make excuses for wearing your pajamas at 2 p.m.
- You can manipulate expressions of sympathy from your friends.
- You can catch up on your reading.
- You can persuade your spouse to wait on you hand and foot.
- You realize that, however important you think your work is, the world gets along just fine without you.
- You don't have to prepare meals or do housework.
- You aren't tempted by the hamburger or pizza commercials on television.
Don't get me wrong. I would much rather have avoided this unpleasant drama. But since the flu is my fate, I intend to take advantage of the situation. Who knows? I may even spend a few extra days in bed just for the fun of it.